The Importance and Role of Gifts in Increasing Love and Affection Among Family Members

In Islamic religious teachings, the family is recognized as the primary center for human upbringing and spiritual growth. Among its traditions, giving gifts to one’s spouse is a commendable practice highly emphasized by the Infallibles (A.S). This article, drawing upon the luminous hadiths of the Prophet Muhammad (S) and the Ahl al-Bayt (A.S), explores the effects and blessings of gift-giving in strengthening family bonds and increasing love between spouses.

The Family: A Garden of Spirituality and Human Perfection

The family, as the first school of human development, holds an unparalleled position in spiritual growth and nurturing the human soul—provided the radiant teachings of the Qur’an and the Ahl al-Bayt (A.S) serve as the foundation of married life. The Prophet of Mercy (S) said in this regard:

“When a man looks at his wife with love, and she looks back at him with affection, Allah gazes upon them with mercy.” (Nahj al-Fasaha, Hadith 621; cited from “Behavioral Models of Lady Fatima (S.A) in the Family”, Comprehensive Humanities Portal).

The Importance and Effects of Gift-Giving and Its Role in Fostering Love and Affection Between Spouses and Children

The Prophet of Mercy (S) emphasized the importance of giving gifts to one’s family:

“Whoever enters the marketplace, buys a gift, and brings it to their family is like one who carries charity to a needy people. They should begin with daughters before sons, for whoever gladdens a daughter is as if they have freed a slave from the descendants of Ishmael. And whoever brings joy to a son is as if they have wept out of fear of Allah, and whoever weeps out of fear of Allah, Allah will admit them into the gardens of bliss.” (Thawab al-A’mal, p. 239, Hadith 1; Al-Amali by al-Saduq, p. 672, Hadith 904; both cited from the Shia Hadith Library).

In another hadith, he (S) said:
“Exchange gifts, for they increase love. Exchange gifts, for they remove grudges.” (Al-Kafi, Vol. 5, p. 144, Hadith 14; cited from the Shia Hadith Library).

Gifts also promote chastity in women. The Prophet (S) said:
“A man’s gift to his wife increases her modesty.” (Man La Yahduruhu al-Faqih, Vol. 4, p. 273; cited from the Shamim Ashna Educational Portal).

Imam al-Sadiq (A.S) also said:
“When one of you travels and returns, they should bring something for their family, whatever is easily attainable.” (Wasail al-Shia, Vol. 8, p. 337; cited from “Spouse Relations”, Hawza Encyclopedia).

Key Points on the Importance of Gifts:

• A tangible sign of love and attention
• A means to strengthen emotional bonds
• A virtuous tradition in the practice of the Infallibles (A.S)

Note: A gift need not be expensive or material. Sometimes, raising well-mannered children is the best gift.

The Messenger of Allah (S) said:
“No father has given their child a better gift than good manners.” (Kanz al-Ummal, Hadith 45411; cited from the Shia Hadith Library).

The Reward of Effort, Service, Gift-Giving, and Gladdening the Family in the Words of the Infallibles (A.S)

The Prophet (S) said about the value of serving one’s family:
“One who strives to provide for their family is like a mujahid (warrior) in the way of Allah.” (Bihar al-Anwar, Vol. 103, p. 13, Hadith 59; cited from the Shia Hadith Library).

Regarding making children happy, he (S) said:
“There is a house in Paradise called ‘Joy.’ None will enter it except those who bring joy to children.” (Kanz al-Ummal, Vol. 3, p. 170, Hadith 6009; cited from the Shia Hadith Library).

Imam al-Sajjad (A.S) said:
“If I enter the marketplace with a dirham (a type of Arabic currency) to buy meat for my family who crave it, it is dearer to me than freeing a slave.” (Wasail al-Shia, Vol. 21, p. 543; cited from the Shia Hadith Library).

The Etiquette of Gift-Giving in the Tradition of the Ahl al-Bayt (A.S)

A loving word before giving a gift makes it more heartfelt. The Prophet (S) said about the impact of loving words:
“A man’s words to his wife, ‘I love you,’ will never leave her heart.” (Al-Kafi, Vol. 5, p. 569, Hadith 59; cited from the Shia Hadith Library).

The Prophet (S) also said:
“The more perfect a person’s faith, the more they express love to their spouse.” (Makarem al-Akhlaq, cited from Imam Sajjad’s (A.S) Treatise, Naraqi’s Commentary; quoted from the Islamic Revolution Cultural Research Institute).

In return, a wife should appreciate her husband’s efforts. The Prophet (S) said about mutual spousal rights:
“It is upon her to wear her finest perfume, her best clothes, and her most beautiful adornments [for her husband].”

Moderation in Expectations, Considering One’s Spouse’s Circumstances

The Prophet (S) said about moderation in demands:
“It is not permissible for a woman to burden her husband beyond his capacity.” (Mustadrak al-Wasail, Vol. 14, p. 242; cited from Anhar Portal).

Imam al-Sadiq (A.S) said about exemplary women and gratitude toward their husbands:
“The best of your women is she who, when given, is grateful, and when denied, remains content.” (Bihar al-Anwar, Vol. 103, p. 239; cited from Anhar Portal).

Appropriate Times for Gift-Giving

Some suitable occasions for giving gifts include:

• Religious occasions (e.g., the birthdays of the Infallibles (A.S), Eid al-Ghadir, Mid-Sha’ban, Women’s Day, Mother’s Day, Daughter’s Day)
• Wedding anniversaries
• Spouse’s and children’s birthdays
• National holidays (e.g., Nowruz, Yalda Night)
• Or spontaneously (outside periods of mourning for the Ahl al-Bayt (A.S)) to bring joy to the family.

Conclusion: Gifts as a Sign of Love Among Family Members

Giving gifts to one’s spouse and children is, in truth:

• A sign of sincere love
• A noble tradition from the Infallibles (A.S)
• A means of drawing closer to Allah
• A factor in strengthening family foundations

As the hadiths demonstrate, even the smallest acts of kindness toward one’s spouse can become great acts of worship, transforming married life into a garden of divine mercy.

References:

• Nahj al-Fasaha, Hadith 621
• Thawab al-A’mal, p. 239, Hadith 1
• Al-Amali by al-Saduq, p. 672, Hadith 904
• Al-Kafi, Vol. 5, p. 144, Hadith 14
• Wasail al-Shia, Vol. 8, p. 337
• Kanz al-Ummal, Hadith 45411
• Bihar al-Anwar, Vol. 103, p. 13, Hadith 59
• Kanz al-Ummal, Vol. 3, p. 170, Hadith 6009
• Wasail al-Shia, Vol. 21, p. 543
• Al-Kafi, Vol. 5, p. 569, Hadith 59
• Mustadrak al-Wasail, Vol. 14, p. 242
• Bihar al-Anwar, Vol. 103, p. 239
• Comprehensive Humanities Portal: https://ensani.ir
• Shia Hadith Library: https://www.hadithlib.com
• Anhar Portal: https://portal.anhar.ir
• Islamic Revolution Cultural Research Institute: https://farsi.khamenei.ir
• Shamim Ashna Educational Portal: https://shamiim.ir

Prepared by: Nazhd Saei